Wow, I've neglected this blog for almost 2 years? That's amazing >.<
So what happened? Well....life happened :P
I didn't travel much this year and I did try my best to settle down. But it turns out, I....cannot. Yet.
The year 2015 pass by with a lot of travelling adventures almost every month, I was so busy working and travelling I cannot find the time to write. And this year, the 2016.... life just get so weird and hectic I barely can think about travelling. I managed to do series of life experiments though, the dating apps experiment and the entrepreneurial experiment to be exact. And both just confirm the commitment issue I tried to deny.
And along with that, another issues start to come out too. I decided, enough is enough. I'm just going to tackle this once and for all. And hopefully it's all.
So here I am now, in Ubud, Bali. All alone trying to figure out myself. Some people say the term "I'm still trying to figure out myself" is a lazy way to describe: I don't want to grow up and be responsible. Maybe that's true, but maybe that's not the case for me. I really do want to grow up and settle down, but the thought of staying put and settle down like most of my friends give me bad anxiety. The more I tried to commit to a business, to a place, to a person or to anything, the more I want to run away. But I do want to settle down. It's confusing.
Conquering fears has been my motto these past years. And this period of time really is the period of conquering one of my biggest fear: commitment. Maybe it sounds counterintuitive trying to level up my commitment game by being carefree. But hey, I have tried to push myself to settle down a bit and commit but it failed. If anything, it gave me bad anxiety and stress. It made me hate where I live and I started to resent anything that I do and anyone that I know. But now, it's been only about two week of solo travelling and living a semi nomadic life and I got to admit I already miss the house where I live a little bit. I miss doing the business that I do, the gym that I go to, the Muaythai place I go to sometimes and the Starbucks near my house where I always went to if I need extra focus to do my works.
So maybe this is it... Before I embark on this experiment/adventure, my mentor said to me, there are 2 types of free spirit: the one that just need to fulfil the need to explore for some time and find the point where she feels that it's enough. Or the one with another type of issue that needs to be resolved. Well, ok, finger crossed that I'm more of the first type then.
So what happened? Well....life happened :P
I didn't travel much this year and I did try my best to settle down. But it turns out, I....cannot. Yet.
The year 2015 pass by with a lot of travelling adventures almost every month, I was so busy working and travelling I cannot find the time to write. And this year, the 2016.... life just get so weird and hectic I barely can think about travelling. I managed to do series of life experiments though, the dating apps experiment and the entrepreneurial experiment to be exact. And both just confirm the commitment issue I tried to deny.
And along with that, another issues start to come out too. I decided, enough is enough. I'm just going to tackle this once and for all. And hopefully it's all.
So here I am now, in Ubud, Bali. All alone trying to figure out myself. Some people say the term "I'm still trying to figure out myself" is a lazy way to describe: I don't want to grow up and be responsible. Maybe that's true, but maybe that's not the case for me. I really do want to grow up and settle down, but the thought of staying put and settle down like most of my friends give me bad anxiety. The more I tried to commit to a business, to a place, to a person or to anything, the more I want to run away. But I do want to settle down. It's confusing.
Conquering fears has been my motto these past years. And this period of time really is the period of conquering one of my biggest fear: commitment. Maybe it sounds counterintuitive trying to level up my commitment game by being carefree. But hey, I have tried to push myself to settle down a bit and commit but it failed. If anything, it gave me bad anxiety and stress. It made me hate where I live and I started to resent anything that I do and anyone that I know. But now, it's been only about two week of solo travelling and living a semi nomadic life and I got to admit I already miss the house where I live a little bit. I miss doing the business that I do, the gym that I go to, the Muaythai place I go to sometimes and the Starbucks near my house where I always went to if I need extra focus to do my works.
So maybe this is it... Before I embark on this experiment/adventure, my mentor said to me, there are 2 types of free spirit: the one that just need to fulfil the need to explore for some time and find the point where she feels that it's enough. Or the one with another type of issue that needs to be resolved. Well, ok, finger crossed that I'm more of the first type then.
